happy birthday LINA

Today, Lina’s birthday so I’ve still got another 40 minutes before time’s up. HAPPY BIRTHDAY LINA!! Sorry today was damn rushed. Promise next time we spend more time together bitchin’ ok? But that is if you want to.

Well, I don’t why I give a shit. Now that I know it doesn’t mean anything to him, why should it mean so much to me? Just because we’re not associated means that 5 years is nothing. What the fuck?! Endured shit with him and it’s nothing to him at the end of the day. Fine, whatever. Since he doesn’t fucking care about this 5 year friendship, I should probably stop bawling my god damn eyes out. “Surrounded by lots of masculine energy, you're feeling empowered and fierce.” is my horoscope for today and I am indeed feeling very fierce. I don’t need any more shit than now. Let him live in his lil wonderful world. I’m gonna live my own.

On a more cheerful note, I have been pretty close to Andrew and Kok Weng lately. More so with Andrew. He said, “I’m gonna love you more this time so that you can get over that shit.” I’m thankful for him being there. I rested my head on his broad shoulders and he rested his head on mine. It was a very loving scene; even Kit thought we look like a couple. Yesterday was the first time Andrew touched my hand and my face. I’m thankful for the hug he gave because I needed it. I had cried the night before; he was there to comfort me. He said he will help me get through it. He’s a nice guy no matter that others think. Kok Weng on the other hand has been flirting with me from Thursday till now but I heard his grandma passed away today, my deepest condolences to him. Hope he’ll be okay soon.

Okay, I’m sure I’ll get over my stupid emotional self. I feel like a fucking complete fool for feeling this way when it actually doesn’t mean anything to him. Strong me is finally back, the one that doesn’t give a fuck. Heck, if he can do it why not me? I have always been stronger than him anyway.

To all who cared, thanks.